Thankful

As I sit down to write this I am conflicted because in one breath I feel like I have no idea what to write, and in the next I am not sure that I will ever stop typing the words that are tumbling out of my brain. How can I find the words to express all that I have to be thankful for? How can I possibly help others understand my gratitude or perhaps even preserve this overwhelming feeling of gratitude that I have in this moment so that I can revisit it myself in the future? I'm not sure that there's an adequate answer to that question, so I'm just going to let these words fall out of my mind, through my fingers, onto this screen.

Thankful. Yes, it is Thanksgiving Day, but even when it isn't, I frequently find myself reveling in this life that is mine. It isn't without difficulty. It doesn't come without hard days, weeks, even years. This life isn't free of hardship or heartache. And yet, I often think to myself, there can't possibly be anyone on this earth that is as blessed as I am. This life is absolutely nothing of what I imagined it would be. I would never, ever, ever have told you that I would find my 27-year-old self living in an urban area a mere hour away from where I grew up. As a senior in high school, I would have predicted that 10 years later, I would be living in a third-world country helping to meet the physical (specifically medical) needs of people in the developing world. But I'm not. Instead I spend my days in a classroom despite the fact that I always said I would never be a teacher. Instead of Thailand, I call North Townsend Street my home. It is not everything I ever wanted life to be. I have found that it is truly so much more.

Thankful. For family, both near and far. Family like my husband who

loves me even in my most unlovable moments. Family that loves in the most incredible ways. Family that proves that distance doesn't matter. Family that makes me laugh and smile on the hardest days. Family that helps prepare Thanksgiving feasts. Family that texts recipes to help from afar. Family that gathers when loved ones are in town. Family that scrambles to make the mashed potatoes and carve the turkey when at the last minute other loved ones are called away to spend time by the bedside of a dying family member. For family that is celebrating in Texas and California. For family that loves, no matter what.

Thankful. For friends that I have known for a lifetime and those I have only met in recent years. Friends that I grew up with and friends who I've met in adulthood who have stretched me and caused me to grow in unbelievable ways. Friends who wake up at 4:30 in the morning to meet me at the gym. Friends who love "my kids" as much as I do and who totally get it when my heart hurts for one of these incredible young people. Friends who live across the street, around the corner, on the other side of the city, an hour down the Thruway, across the country, and around the world. Friends who I could not possibly love more if they were my own flesh and blood. Friends who feel like they are flesh and blood even when they speak a different first language, come from a different background, and look completely different from me. Friends who know exactly what I need and when I need it and they jump in and do whatever that is. Friends who clear my table, wash, dry, and put away my dishes after a Thanksgiving meal that they shared around our table in our home in this beautiful, wonderful neighborhood we call home. Friends who "get" me, who understand my heart, my calling, my passions. Friends who bless me in more ways than I could ever have hoped for.

Thankful. For home. For feeling more at home in this space than I probably ever have in my whole life. My heart is at home. This neighborhood is one of the absolute biggest blessings in my life. As I type this, I'm listening to three precious children giggling away as they work on homework in my dining room. They are writing thank you letters to policemen, reading books off my shelf, and practicing their alphabet. This neighborhood lets me walk for half a block and buy the best coconut milk, spices, and tropical fruit from the best little Vietnamese store. This neighborhood has me opening my door at 6:00 to two more neighbors, sharing apple crisp, and reveling in the beauty that comes in diversity. This neighborhood has given me neighbors that shower me in thanks in the form of eggs, chicken, and paper towels. Neighbors that shovel our driveway without being asked. Neighbors who allow me to share in their first-ever snowball fight. Neighbors that welcome us into their homes for afternoons, meals, or even for days, weeks, and months while we were between housing. Neighbors who make me laugh nearly every time I interact with them. Neighbors who call me in tears when they are at their lowest moments and are in need of a listening ear. Neighbors who ask to celebrate their birthdays in our home. This neighborhood is home in the best way imaginable.

Thankful. For a job that I love. For incredible co-workers. For the best students. For an administrator who is everything I could ask for me and more. Thankful. For a warm home. For delicious, healthy food in my refrigerator. For my health. For my upbringing. For financial stability. For a God that loves me. Who desires the best for me and those that I love. A God who inspires me to do what I do. A God whose love covers all. A God who is faithful even when I am not. A God who orchestrates things in such incredible ways that I will never fully understand. A God who knows me better than I know myself. A God who created this life for me and placed me exactly where He wants. A God who is bigger and greater and better than I could ever possibly imagine. A God who chooses to bless me in such absolutely incredible ways.

Thankful. Yesterday. Today. Tomorrow. Always. For the things I listed. And SO much, much more.

I am more blessed than I could ever have imagined.